The Things That Were Lost

My mom actually does have a gold watch, or had one many years ago when we lived in Wisconsin. It was lost when she let me hold it and I dropped it down the wagon's heating vent. I don't recall why I did this. I do remember that she was less mad and more stunned.

Several things have been lost through the years. There are the intangibles, such as the belief your parents know everything, or the conviction your children are perfect. (Certainly the watch incident ruined that illusion.) And then there are the actual things that went missing. The less precious ones are too numerous to count - sweaters, softball gloves, retainers...But there are a few key pieces which are missed so much, they've become part of our family vernacular. In 7th grade my mom packed me off to a school bake sale with an enormous (and apparently one-of-a-kind) Tupperware container. The Tupperware was never seen again, and to this day when I allude to anything being misplaced, my mother will shriek, "Tupperware container! Tupperware container!" She never even mentions the cameo earrings from her 16th birthday that the plumber stole off my dresser top.

My sisters are equal offenders. The younger one loses so many things that we all cringe when she opens something nice at Christmas, knowing it will be lost by the New Year. The older does less losing and more misplacing. She provided many an evening's theatrics standing in front of her closet screaming accusations about some stolen skirt or belt. The obscenities stopped only when I, with courage unprecedented in a young child, stepped into her abyss and located the article front and center on the rack.

Despite such shaky beginnings, now as an adult I don't lose anything. (I refrain comment on the sisters.) Instead, I've married someone who loses everything and it infuriates me.
Daily from him: Where are the keys? Where are my vitamins? Where do "we" keep the stamps?
Annually from him: Where is the car registration? Where is the grill lighter? Where are the tax receipts?
Occasionally from me: WHERE THE HELL ARE THE 2006 TAX RETURNS?

Except for the things he loses (i.e. tax returns), I have a running mental inventory of everything in our lives. To a fault perhaps, because unlike my mom I hold a grudge when things go missing. There was a spoon three silverware sets ago that my roommate took to work and never brought back. And I'd like my copy of Jodi Picoult's The Pact returned, thank you. And to my nearest and dearest husband, could you please locate the turquoise towel I've had since college that belongs with its mate in the linen closet?

I realize this trait is unattractive. Last year I had a bad slip and carelessly left a treasured necklace in a hotel glass. Room service collected and the necklace was gone. I immediately called my mom, crying. (Side note: If we post her phone records her claims that she is no longer needed by her children would be quickly refuted.) So, I'm on the phone sniveling and Sooz, always a fan of straight talk said, "It's just a thing honey. That necklace is just a thing. You shouldn't be so attached." "I know, I know," I sniffed.

And I do know. I still really miss that necklace but nothing too great was lost when it was. I am lucky that the things I have lost have been, for the most part, things. And trite though it may be, we do have our memories and we have each other. Now where is that turquoise towel?